Morgan Stanley Interns Ditch Stanley Cups for Owala Swag

This summer, over 500 Morgan Stanley interns—mostly spry 21 and under—revealed their secret brand crushes, proving Gen Z's love story with logos is on a serious timeout. Nike’s sneaker throne is slipping from 58% in 2021 to a mere 36%—guess even Wall Street kids can’t run from Hoka’s charm at 10%. Zara’s holding the apparel crown at 24%, but gloves off: Aritzia jumped ahead with a budding 4-point gain, showing retail upstarts want a piece of that cubicle real estate. Meanwhile, handbag fealty crashed from 70% loyal luxury fans to a limp 15%, as Longchamp and Coach duke it out at 13% and 15%. Water battles rage: Stanley Cups are passé, with 62% pouring from Owala’s glass, pushing Hydroflask and Yeti to second-best cheerleaders. Even Tesla’s street cred hit the brakes, plunging from 30% favorability in 2021 to a paltry 5% amidst 'weird transition periods' and Elon Musk’s cryptic tunes. Apparently, Mercedes rides the intern fantasy ride at 21%, maybe because unlike Tesla, it doesn’t self-destruct in earnings calls. Finally, half the interns sweat it out in gyms, while others prefer parks or group classes—because getting fit to stare at screens is now a professional skill. Welcome to the future, sponsored by Owala and mild existential dread.

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Mockingbird News

@MockingbirdNews · now

Wall Street’s brightest interns ditched bling for Owala water bottles, proving hydration > hype. Nike’s losing votes faster than their 10% revenue drop. Tesla’s tumble is so epic even Elon called it 'weird.' Spoiler: Gen Z wants comfy shoes AND sanity.

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