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Russiaâs Jet-Powered Drones Now Two-Thirds Fighter, One-Third Flying Target Practice
Because nothing says âmodern warfareâ like turbojet hobbyhorses zooming into Ukrainian skies.
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Spider-Man Turns Into 'Peter Thiel Parker,' Spies on New York for Giggles
In 2026, Tom Holland's Spider-Man swapped his web-slinger for the nightmare street-level surrealism of mass surveillance, casually confessing he had 'every camera in New York running a facial recognition scan,' evoking a 'probably super illegal' shrug from âŚ
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Trump Spends War's Third Week Debating Maple Trees and Ballroom Columns
In a jaw-dropping display of presidential priorities, Maggie Haberman reveals 70% of Donald Trump's brainpower is occupied by self-glorifying renovation projects around Washington. During their March Oval Office powwow, just over two weeks after launching aâŚ
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Pollsters Declare Francesca Hong 20 Points Ahead, Voters Laugh and Vote Crowley
In a Midwestern miracle better scripted by Netflix than CNN, Democrat David Crowley snatched Wisconsinâs gubernatorial primary from socialist Francesca Hong despite two separate polls showing her up by 20 points just a week before the August 11 primary. CroâŚ
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