Mockingbird News

Two Dozen Democrats Vote With Republicans To Say No to Impeachment…Again

Democrats hate impeachment but fear angering their own voters — democracy by shrug.

In a truly bipartisan game of congressional hot potato on December 11, 2025, 23 Democrats rashly joined 214 Republicans ...

Welcome to Menopause Tech: Pee in a Cup, Get Hormones by Doorbell

Because midlife chaos wasn't complete without lab-grade urine analysis at home.

Forget hush-hush menopause suffering—now it’s high-tech symptom stalking with companies like Mira and Pandia Health turn...

Google’s New Disco Browser Opens Tabs Like It’s Your Forgetful Friend

Because who needs focus when you can have 47 related tabs open instead?

Google’s Chrome team apparently decided the browser world needed more chaos and launched Disco, a browser that builds a ...

Yelp Declares In-N-Out, Dave's Hot Chicken And Arugula Kings Of America

America's taste buds apparently judge restaurants by crinkle fries and blunt ultimatums.

On Tuesday, Yelp dropped its 2025 Most Beloved Restaurant Chains list, where cult burger lord In-N-Out, Dave's Hot Chick...

Trump Administration Kills SAVE Plan, Millions To Pay More Because… Law

If you take a loan, you must pay it back—said Undersecretary Nicholas Kent, very kindly.

In a dazzling display of bipartisan timing, Trump's Department of Education announced on a Tuesday that the SAVE student...

Incumbent Democrats Brace for Progressive Rematch Comedy Tour in 2024

Because nothing says 'status quo' like getting politely challenged twice in a row.

In the grand tradition of political déjà vu, Rep. Valerie Foushee (D-N.C.) is gearing up for round two against Nida Alla...

America’s Steakhouse Obsession Returns with Burgers That Think They’re Fancy

Martinis and blue cheese wedges make medium-rare ribeyes great again.

2025 was a wild rollercoaster for U.S. restaurants, but hey, at least thick tavern-style burgers got their overdue glow-...

Ukraine Discovers Teen Gamers Can Now 'Call of Duty' Real Tanks to Death

Turns out skipping math for joystick practice has unexpected military ROI.

In a plot twist nobody saw coming since 2005, Ukraine’s drone schools in Kyiv and Lviv have scientifically confirmed tha...

Woman Gives Birth in Waymo Robotaxi, Baby’s First Ride Is Driverless

Because waiting for a human driver is apparently overrated in San Francisco.

In an utterly predictable 2025 twist, a woman in San Francisco gave birth right in the backseat of a Waymo robotaxi whil...

Adobe Credits AI for $23.77B in Revenue, Stock Decides to Sulk

When your earnings grow but your share price goes on a diet.

Adobe proudly announced a record-breaking $23.77 billion revenue for fiscal year 2025—an 11% increase—largely due to the...

MAGA Squad Throws Tantrum Bigger Than Their Twitter Followers

When you spend years attacking outsiders but forget to keep it in-house.

The MAGA media circus reached peak chaos recently as Candace Owens accused her former employer Turning Point USA of plot...

Cheese Store of Beverly Hills Outsmarts Tariffs with TikTok Teens

Nothing says 'cheese hustle' like Australian honeymooners and 280k Instagram fans.

Dominick DiBartolomeo, who resurrected the 57-year-old Cheese Store of Beverly Hills from pre-phone, pre-bus days, now w...

Trump's Mega Tanker Drama: Bigger Than His Ego

The US commandeered a giant Venezuelan crude tanker called Skipper, saying it’s linked to Iran-backed terror groups, hig...

Sperm Donor: For Science, Spoiler of Lives

A healthy sperm donor with a rare TP53 mutation, linked to Li-Fraumeni syndrome, unknowingly fathered at least 197 child...

Sperm Donor's Football Team: The ICANN Special Edition

Meet the coolest sperm donor you've ever ignored – he’s actually a walking ball of genetic chaos in blue jeans. Lucky hi...

Trump Turns Southwest Border Into Navy’s Newest Restricted Party Zone

Who knew securing borders meant secret bases on old Teddy Roosevelt land?

In a move that screams bureaucratic cosplay, President Trump's administration announced on an undecided Wednesday that 7...

WBD’s TV Networks Worth Less Than My Groceries

Paramount Skydance is throwing shade at Warner Bros. Discovery, claiming their TV networks like CNN and TBS are vastly o...

Legal AI Startup Now Worth $8 Billion, Still Only Serves Lawyers Who Know How to Turn It On

Serving single-digit percentages while dreaming of a trillion-dollar legal tech pie.

Winston Weinberg’s legal tech startup Harvey just hit an $8 billion valuation after raising $160 million from a16z, yet ...

Venezuelan Opposition Leader Makes Oslo Debut after 11-Year Travel Ban, Because Why Not

She stealthily defies Maduro, lands Nobel Peace chill party at Grand Hotel.

María Corina Machado, 58-year-old industrial engineer turned pro-democracy magician, popped up in Oslo after an 11-month...

Congress Demands Boat Strike Videos, Holds Secretary’s Vacation Hostage

The Pentagon’s travel budget is in limbo until Congress can binge the unedited Caribbean drama.

On a clear Wednesday vote of 312 to 112, the US House blessed a colossal 3,000-page defense bill authorizing a staggerin...