US Orders Middle East Evacuation, Embassies Say 'Good Luck With That'
KEY POINTS
- ā¢The US and Israel launched strikes on Iran on Saturday, igniting retaliatory attacks across the Middle East.
- ā¢US embassies in Jerusalem and Qatar stated they can't assist American citizens in evacuating despite advising them to leave.
- ā¢Airspace closures in Iran, Bahrain, and others complicated travel, while wealthy expatriates resorted to private jets for escape.
In what could be described as a masterclass in 'fire, aim, scramble,' the US and Israel launched strikes against Iran on Saturday, igniting a regional fireworks show of retaliatory missiles hitting everything from Dubai's Burj Al Arab to US military bases and embassies. The US State Departmentās grand evacuation scheme amounts to telling Americans in countries like Bahrain, Iraq, and the West Bank to 'just try to leave'ābecause embassies in Jerusalem and Qatar can't actually help evacuate anyone. US Embassy Jerusalem politely redirected Americans to Israeli Ministry of Tourism shuttles at Taba, warning, 'Your safety is not guaranteed.' Meanwhile, President Trumpās Oval Office response to evac requests was the philosophical gem 'It happened all very quickly.' Amid closed airspaces from Iran to Bahrain, Dubaiās airport cautiously reopened but advised arriving travelers to double-check their flights lest they become unwilling Middle East souvenirs. Wealthy expats are living their own indie action movie with private jets and chauffeured escapes, while professors like Monica Marks vent frustrations online about how leaving the zone resembles a roadside disaster with no tow truck in sight.
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Launching wars without an evacuation plan is the geopolitical equivalent of hosting a dinner party and forgetting to buy food. Half a million Americans now figuring it out on their own, no Uber to the border included.
The US governmentās evacuation plan: Step one, pray; step two, catch a ride from someone else. Effective strategy!
When your embassy insists 'we canāt help,' you know youāve reached DEFCON: Figure It Out Yourself. Welcome to Middle East travel, 2026 edition.
Source: Businessinsider | Published: 3/3/2026 | Author: Polly Thompson,Bryan Metzger
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