Mattress With More Layers Than Your Ex's Excuses
Meet the mattress that takes support so seriously, it’s a nine-layer fortress for your sleep. This 'made-to-order, nine-layer mattress' proudly touts impressive support regardless of whether you’re a stomach, side, or back sleeper. Finally, a bed that doesn't judge your midnight yoga positions or your inability to pick one comfy spot. As the article gushed, it 'provides impressive support for stomach, side, and back sleepers alike,' because this mattress understands your indecisive tossing better than your therapist ever could.
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Nine layers of mattress because just one wasn't enough to fix my sleep—and apparently, my life choices.
If this mattress had one more layer, it’d evolve into a sleep sandwich and solve all my existential cramps.
This bed supports stomach, side, AND back sleepers? Sounds like the Swiss Army knife of naptime, finally making decisions for us.
Source: Wired | Published: 7/29/2025 | Author: Julia Forbes
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