Wall Street Bets Big on AI, Prays Robots Don’t Steal All Their Jobs

KEY POINTS

•Wall Street strategists entered 2026 bullish but conditioned on AI delivering measurable returns this year.
•Alphabet's market cap surged to $4 trillion after Apple and Walmart announced partnerships using its Gemini AI.
•Despite fears about AI replacing workers, investors focus on profit growth as they cautiously embrace the AI economy.

Kicking off 2026 with more optimism than your caffeinated morning, Wall Street strategists are throwing big bucks at AI—but only if it actually makes money this year, no pressure. Alphabet flexed its $4 trillion muscle Monday after Apple blessed its Gemini AI to run Siri (because your iPhone needed an upgrade from being 'just' barely helpful), while Walmart hopes Gemini powers up drone delivery, aka 'Cost-Cutting 101.' After dodging a $230 billion DOJ breakup drama in September 2025, Alphabet became Big Tech’s gold medalist, proving investors now worship AI only if it’s the responsible spending kind that spits out tangible returns—because who trusts Silicon Valley’s reckless billion-dollar tantrums anymore? Yet, Bob Elliott worries AI slashing jobs might spike profits but leave the economy looking like a ghost town. In classic Wall Street style, everyone’s tentatively riding this bubbly AI roller coaster while quietly hoping the robots turn out to be friendly and not single-handedly end human employment.