Trump Declares Military Karaoke: Venezuela First, Cuba Next, Mexico Maybe Later
KEY POINTS
- •On January 3rd, Trump ordered the U.S. military to invade Venezuela and seize President Nicolás Maduro.
- •Trump warned Mexico, Cuba, and Colombia might be targeted next, citing failures and cartel control.
- •Colombia, Cuba, Mexico, and many U.S. politicians condemned the attack, demanding Congressional involvement.
On January 3rd, 2026, the U.S., led by President Trump, apparently mistook Venezuela for an epic game of Risk and invaded Caracas to snatch President Nicolás Maduro. Not stopping there, Trump peeked over his geopolitical checklist and ominously threatened Mexico, Cuba, and Colombia, casually labeling Cuba a 'failing nation' and Mexico a cartel-run soap opera starring President Claudia Sheinbaum, who’s basically too scared to call for help. Meanwhile, Marco Rubio hinted that being in Havana’s government would be like sitting on a powder keg. Colombian leader Gustavo Petro, accused of hiding cocaine factories equivalent to a DEA binge-watch marathon, snarled back, claiming Trump’s strikes might have hit civilians. Congress, as confused as a cat in a laser pointer store, demanded briefings, reminding everyone that military operations usually need a thumbs-up from Capitol Hill, not a late-night tweetstorm.
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Trump just turned Latin America into his personal episode of 'Survivor: Drug Cartels & Dictatorship Edition' without even asking Congress for permission.
Nothing says 'international diplomacy' like invading a country on a Saturday and threatening neighbors like a Twitter troll with a massive ego.
Trump’s foreign policy: launch missiles, make vague threats to three countries, ghost congressional approval like it’s a bad Tinder date.
Source: Axios | Published: 1/3/2026 | Author: Andrew Childers
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