Helene Hits 6 States, Changes Minds None
In a stunning display of meteorological bad timing, Storm Helene crashed through six unsuspecting US states like an uninvited relative at Thanksgiving. Despite its power, the aftermath felt less like a natural disaster and more like that friend who promises to help but forgetsâbecause oddly, Helene didnât truly change anything substantial. No iconic flooding, no cities underwater, just wind gusts blowing away before anyone could check their Amazon packages. The stormâs six-state corridor stretched from wherever people were chilled enough to notice, right up to mild inconvenience territory. Experts remain baffled, and yes, weâre all still terrible drivers of our own lives.
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A storm hits six states and the official change it brings? Exactly the same amount of disruption as a dropped phone call during a Zoom meeting: technically loud, mostly irrelevant.
Helene raced through six states faster than I race to regret my Amazon Prime purchases, yet no major damage. A true hero in underachievement.
Weather forecasters prepared for chaos, Helene arrived to quietly prove that six states can be politely inconvenienced and move on.
Source: Grist | Published: 9/26/2025 | Author: Ayurella Horn-Muller
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