Helene Hits 6 States, Changes Minds None
In a stunning display of meteorological bad timing, Storm Helene crashed through six unsuspecting US states like an uninvited relative at Thanksgiving. Despite its power, the aftermath felt less like a natural disaster and more like that friend who promises to help but forgetsābecause oddly, Helene didnāt truly change anything substantial. No iconic flooding, no cities underwater, just wind gusts blowing away before anyone could check their Amazon packages. The stormās six-state corridor stretched from wherever people were chilled enough to notice, right up to mild inconvenience territory. Experts remain baffled, and yes, weāre all still terrible drivers of our own lives.
Share the Story
A storm hits six states and the official change it brings? Exactly the same amount of disruption as a dropped phone call during a Zoom meeting: technically loud, mostly irrelevant.
Helene raced through six states faster than I race to regret my Amazon Prime purchases, yet no major damage. A true hero in underachievement.
Weather forecasters prepared for chaos, Helene arrived to quietly prove that six states can be politely inconvenienced and move on.
Source: Grist | Published: 9/26/2025 | Author: Ayurella Horn-Muller
More Articles in US News
Ed Sheeran Launches 2026 LOOP Tour, Tickets Not Looping Into Your Wallet
Congress Trades Shouting Match Over ICE Shooting Like A Twin Cities Soap Opera
Federal Agents Play Hide-And-Seek With Guns, Accidentally Shoot People
ICE Agent Did Exactly What He Was Taught, But No One Knows What That Means
Budget Airline Drops Deportation Flights After Discovering Politics Isnāt Free
Restaurants Spend More Staffing Candle Duty Than Serving Food
Retired U.S. Professor Moves to Mexico, Learns Roosters Are Expensive Alarm Clocks
