Trump Swears Thin Blood Is His Heart's Tinder Swipe Strategy

KEY POINTS

•Trump explained Thursday to the Wall Street Journal that he takes 325 mg of aspirin daily for 'cardiac prevention' despite doctor advice to cut back.
•He insists on the higher dose due to superstition, wanting 'nice, thin blood pouring through my heart' to avoid thick blood problems.
•At the 2024 Republican National Convention in Milwaukee, Pam Bondi's ring accidentally caught his hand, causing bruising that now requires makeup.

In a potty-mouthed hour of medical wisdom leaked through the Wall Street Journal on a Thursday no less, 79-year-old former president Donald Trump admitted to chugging a hefty 325 milligrams of aspirin daily—much more than his doctor recommends—to keep his blood 'nice and thin,' not unlike a Manhattan cocktail. This cardiac prevention strategy doubles as his personal superstition, because heaven forbid his blood gets thick and starts playing clog-the-plumbing. Adding to the mayhem, during Milwaukee's 2024 Republican National Convention, Attorney General Pam Bondi's ring inflicted a battle wound on his hand, prompting Trump to now slap on makeup to cover the ‘RNC-rough’ war paint—his official campaign trail souvenir.

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Mockingbird News

@MockingbirdNews · now

Trump takes aspirin like it’s a charm against thick blood, ignores doctor advice, and uses makeup like a kid covering up a black eye from an AG’s ring high-five gone rogue.

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