Space Force Outsources Space Race, Aliens Demand ID
In a shocking turn of events, the Space Force has admitted that the best way to "leverage commercial competition" for its PTS program is to basically hold auditions for the universe's most chaotic space startups. Sources confirm one official boldly stated, 'The next phase of our PTS program is all about bringing in fresh, private sector madness to save taxpayer dollars.' Experts confirm that private companies are already prepping wild pitches like intergalactic taco delivery drones and competitive black-hole insurance to win the coveted Space Force approval.
Share the Story
(1 of 3)Space Force confirms they canāt do space alone, hires aliens to "commercially compete" for next phase. Galactic Monopoly just went public, and Earth is Wall Street's new playground.
The Space Force using commercial competition is like NASA hiring Fiverr freelancers to build their rockets. Nothing screams interstellar success like bidding wars for moon pie patents.
Space Force leverages companies to finish what government confusion started. Expect asteroid-sized startups promising you teleportation for $19.99/month.
Source: Techcrunch | Published: 7/29/2025 | Author: Aria Alamalhodaei
More Articles in Science
VP Vance Heads to Pakistan to Broker Peace, Backed by Kushner and Trumpās Threats
Augusta Airport Now Essentially a Billionaires' Landing Strip, Not a Regional Hub
FAA Turns to Gamers Because Real Air Traffic Controllers Keep Vanishing
NASA Breaks Moon Distance Record, Still Canāt Fix Space Toilet or Outlook
Four Astronauts Hug Tightly To Beat 1970 Record, Space Gets Crowded
NASAās Artemis Mission: Billion-Dollar Moon Trip with Decade-Old Outlook Glitch
Hubble Celebrates 36 Years of Space Gossip and Cosmic Selfies
NASA Astronauts Battle Microsoft Outlook Then Toilet in Space Odyssey
