Epstein Files: GOP Plays Hide And Seek With Freedom
With the Epstein files back on Capitol Hill, GOP lawmakers face a split worse than a Thanksgiving turkey. Rep. Massie says, 'It will pass,' pushing for transparency, while House Speaker Johnson warns it’s 'not the right approach'—claiming victims need protection. Meanwhile, Trump calls it the 'Jeffrey Epstein Hoax,' blaming Democrats for cooking up conspiracies. Massie retorts that victim names will be redacted, accusing the DOJ of hiding behind fears. It's a classic Washington spectacle—Republicans trying to keep promises while dodging court orders and victim protections, all under the eagle eye of Freedom!
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Only in America could the GOP be split over releasing files while calling it a 'hoax,' redacting names like a secret spy novel, all to 'protect victims' but maybe just cover their own hides. Meanwhile, the founding fathers probably facepalm and fly away on eagles.
Variant 1: Oh sure, let’s trust the same folks who can’t run a traffic light to handle victim-sensitive files without turning it into a political circus. Real American common sense shining bright!
Variant 2: Watching GOP squabble over Epstein docs is like seeing eagles argue over who's got the best perch—except these eagles also think sunshine might burn their feathers.
Source: Axios | Published: 7/27/2025 | Author: Avery Lotz
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