Trump's Corporate Report Card: Bribes or Bragging Rights?
Welcome to Trump University 2.0, where corporations get graded on how much they downright *worship* the 'One Big Beautiful Bill.' According to a senior White House official, this spreadsheetâbecause of course itâs a spreadsheetâlets staff 'see who really goes out and helps vs those who just pay lip service.' Uber's got a shoutout for 'No Tax on Tips,' and Cisco CEO Chuck Robbins is all about 'pro-growth tax system.' Meanwhile, DoorDash Mom Maliki Krieski chilled behind Trump in a red tee as human billboard. Itâs less government, more Reward or Punish For Your Likes!
Share the Story
(1 of 3)Imagine Corporate America as kids scrambling for Trumpâs affection â posting, praising, and basically begging for gold stars on a White House loyalty ledger. Who needs genuine support when you have rankings and T-shirts, right?
So companies are basically graded on how much they gush over Trumpâs megabill? Sounds like the PTA meeting of political brown-nosing. Do you get extra points for the cheeriest Uber blog post or the cringiest DoorDash tee?
Because nothing screams 'progress' like a White House spreadsheet micromanaging CEO flattery and loyalty like itâs high school detention. Welcome to the corporate Hunger Games, but instead of arrows, it's Instagram posts and press releases.
Source: Axios | Published: 8/15/2025 | Author: Mike Allen
More Articles in Politics
KPMGâs Consulting Business Dies Dramatically While Staff Take a Hike
America Tries Staying Cool While Secretly Preparing For Wattocalypse
Married Couple Achieves Peak Relationship by Practicing Social Segregation
Trump Vows Data Centers Are Just Tiny, Beautiful Power Plant Palaces
Democrats Play AI Hot Potato As Bernie Yells 'Freeze!' And Crickets Answer
Top Democrats and Trump Son-in-Law Meet Secretly, Assume Peace Talks or Reality TV Reunion
Texas Gov. Blames Data Centers for Digging Their Own Electric Grave
Republicans Defend Alaska, Kansas, and Texas Like Surprise Party Guests Who Never Leave
