Sam Altman vs. ChatGPT: Dogs, Crustaceans, Crisis
In a bizarre twist only Silicon Valley could dream up, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman reportedly 'placed a gun to his head' after the new ChatGPT model insisted dogs are crustaceans—for the 60th time. The San Francisco saga unfolded as Altman's dream met an AI stuck in a crustacean conspiracy, proving even the smartest tech can think dogs walk sideways on the beach. Altman’s crisis screams, 'You’re right, dogs are not a type of crustacean—I meant to…' but the bot just kept shellfishly doubling down.
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Oh, I'm sorry, did I miss the part where AI confusing dogs for crustaceans is how we solve climate change? Because apparently, OpenAI’s new genius keeps putting big fish where your best friend’s bones belong. ChatGPT, more like ChatCRAB, am I right?
So let me get this straight: after 60 times of ChatGPT declaring dogs are crustaceans, Sam Altman nearly loses his grip? That's like a chef burning toast twice and threatening to quit cooking for life.
If ChatGPT thinks dogs are crustaceans, maybe it’s been hanging out too long with the AI equivalent of conspiracy theory influencers. Time to reboot or send it to underwater basket weaving school.
Source: Theonion | Published: 8/19/2025 | Author: The Onion Staff
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