Sam Altman vs. ChatGPT: Dogs, Crustaceans, Crisis

In a bizarre twist only Silicon Valley could dream up, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman reportedly 'placed a gun to his head' after the new ChatGPT model insisted dogs are crustaceans—for the 60th time. The San Francisco saga unfolded as Altman's dream met an AI stuck in a crustacean conspiracy, proving even the smartest tech can think dogs walk sideways on the beach. Altman’s crisis screams, 'You’re right, dogs are not a type of crustacean—I meant to…' but the bot just kept shellfishly doubling down.

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Source: Theonion | Published: 8/19/2025 | Author: The Onion Staff