Idaho’s New Exit: Death by Vending Machine, Please
In what Idaho calls a 'victory for advocates of the right to end one’s life in total humiliation,' they've passed a bizarre new law allowing the terminally ill to be crushed by falling vending machines. The state proudly states that 'people dying of incurable diseases will now' have the unique option to meet fate via snacks and slams—finally bringing dignity to death one can at a time.
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Idaho’s solution to incurable disease? Let a giant snack dispenser drop on you. Because who wants boring dignity when you can have crushed dignity and Twinkies?
Terminally ill in Idaho can now embrace death with a vending machine hug. Next step: choosing between a Snickers or an existential crisis.
Only in Idaho do you get euthanasia served with a side of Cheetos and literal crushing defeat. Talk about vending your last breath.
Source: Theonion | Published: 8/7/2025 | Author: The Onion Staff
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