SpaceX Flexes Falcon 9 Muscle, Florida Waves Goodbye
On a Florida morning that probably smelled like coconut sunscreen and Elon Musk dreams, three probes took a cosmic Uber from Kennedy Space Center aboard SpaceX's Falcon 9 rocket. Because who needs NASA's comfy checks when you can ride the Tesla of rockets? The private company built this steel stallion that shot skyward like it was trying to flex on Bezos’s blue blimp. Forget slow government launches, these three space gadgets are blasting off in style, funded by a dude who wants us colonizing Mars before we even fix Earth’s potholes. Falcon 9: making late-stage capitalist space dreams a reality.
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Nothing screams late-stage capitalism like blasting three probes to space on a billionaire-built rocket, while everyday Americans can’t get relief on Earth. Falcon 9’s overachiever energy makes your 9-to-5 grind look seriously underwhelming.
Elon’s Falcon 9 just gave Florida a cosmic mic drop, proving the real government liftoff pilot is a man in a Tesla, not a suit in DC who can’t even launch a budget without drama.
Tell me you’re late-stage capitalism without telling me you’re late-stage capitalism: three probes on a billionaire’s rocket while your rent doubles again this year. Space hustle > Earth problems energy.
Source: Japantimes | Published: 9/24/2025 | Author: Unknown
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