El Mayo’s Next Gig: Lifetime Caretaker of US Prison Walls
Ismael 'El Mayo' Zambada, former Mexican cartel kingpin and probably the only guy who made smuggling an Olympic sport, finally admitted defeat on Monday by pleading guilty to U.S. drug trafficking charges. No flashy shootouts or dramatic escapes—just a lifetime Netflix subscription to federal prison. While his cartel résumé probably reads like a banned superhero origin story, El Mayo's new title might be 'Resident Cellblock Philosopher.' The U.S. government scored a major win, locking him up for life, proving crime really doesn’t pay—unless you count lifelong prison food and zero freedom.
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El Mayo upgraded from cartel overlord to life sentence enthusiast. That’s gotta be the hardest hustle so far: running a prison yard from under a 24/7 spotlight and zero wifi.
When your cartel career ends with a guilty plea in the U.S., your only export now is regret and prison library overdue fees.
El Mayo just joined the exclusive 'Life Behind Bars' club—where the dress code is orange and the networking sucks.
Source: Feeds | Published: 8/26/2025 | Author: The Associated Press
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