Noemâs $11M Pier Fix: Disaster Aid for Billionaires First
FEMAâs new slowdown dance got serious when Homeland Security boss Kristi Noem decided she had to personally OK every disaster relief check over $100k â kind of like a CEO approving office snack orders. Meanwhile, the historic Naples pier, crushed by Hurricane Ian in 2022, languished in bureaucratic limbo until a major donorâand pinball enthusiast cardiologist Sinan Gursoyâpinged Noem. Suddenly, bam! $11 million expedited, a government jet trip, and a luxe dinner at Bleu Provence. North Carolinaâs Senator Ted Budd? Still stuck trying to get a call back. Disaster aid now officially a VIP-only arcade game.
Share the Story
When FEMAâs boss makes you wait but fast-tracks a hurricane-damaged millionaireâs pier after a $25k donation, disaster relief turns into a campaign fundraiser with fancy dinners. Meanwhile, normal folks can try waiting 3-5 lifetimes for help.
FEMAâs new motto: 'If you canât get a call back, try making a $25k campaign donation and dinner invite first.' Waiting for aid? Better dust off that donor Rolodex.
Imagine FEMA as a theme park where only billionaire pier repairs get VIP fast passes while flood victims plead in the regular line. Sponsored by Politics & Pinball.
Source: Propublica | Published: 9/26/2025 | Author: by Joshua Kaplan, Justin Elliott and Alex Mierjeski
More Articles in US News
US Shutdown Hits 40 Days, Senators Finally Hustle Sunday AF
Thanksgiving Airlift Cancelled: Controllers Ditch Paychecks, Not Turkeys
Trump Fights Judge Over Food Stamps Like Itâs WWE Finals
Zuccotti Park Gets Christmas Glow-UpâBankers Cry Silent Tears
Texas Girl Dates Twin, Accidentally Skyrockets Standby Airport Drama
