Convicted Sex Offender Masters Networking Better Than LinkedIn Pros

KEY POINTS

•Jeffrey Epstein kept cultivating ties with global elites, using emails between 2013 and 2018 to try arranging meetings with Putin and Lavrov.
•Investigations into Epstein’s connections were launched by Poland, Latvia, and Lithuania, focusing on espionage links and human trafficking.
•UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer fired Peter Mandelson for his years-old associations with Epstein after new document revelations caused political uproar.

Jeffrey Epstein’s 2008 conviction didn’t slow his hustle one bit—he was still emailing global bigwigs like a middle-of-the-night telemarketer craving elite deals. From begging former Norwegian PM Thorbjørn Jagland to arrange chats with Putin and Sergey Lavrov (spoiler: no dice), to offering 'confidential' job help for the late Russian UN diplomat Vitaly Churkin’s son, Epstein was the social butterfly in a toxic swamp. Poland’s Donald Tusk sparked probes about Russian espionage while Latvia and Lithuania jumped on human trafficking investigations. Meanwhile, UK’s Prime Minister Keir Starmer scrambled to fire Peter Mandelson after revelations of secret Epstein payments in ’03–’04 and passing financial crisis secrets. Bonus scandal: Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor lost his royal titles and perhaps brain cells after being caught in compromising photos and shady trade envoy gossip. Israel’s Ehud Barak shacked up repeatedly at Epstein’s NYC pad from 2015-2019 but insists he ‘never saw anything inappropriate.’ In the epic fail department, Slovak official Miroslav Lajčák blamed 'foolish male ego texts' for his resignation, insisting no girls were involved, despite the obvious timing. Spoiler alert: the Epstein file fireworks are still far from over.