Trump’s Secret Greenland Soap Opera: Spies, Lists & Alien Dreams

In a plot twist that sounds like a fridge magnet left too long in the freezer, Denmark’s Foreign Minister Lars Løkke Rasmussen pulled the tough guy move of summoning the U.S. Embassy’s head after discovering that at least three Americans with Trump ties allegedly ran a covert influence campaign in Greenland. These high-stakes house guests compiled lists of Trump-friendly locals, targeted opponents for a political roast, and tried to feed dirt to U.S. media — basically the political version of 'Mean Girls' but with ice and potential uranium. Meanwhile, Trump’s not just dreaming big; he's mooting military force to snatch the world’s largest island, rich in gold, silver, copper, uranium, and maybe enough oil to power a fleet of golf carts. Denmark, cool and collected as always, shot down the theatrics. The White House, for its part, decided the best commentary is no commentary. So Greenland isn’t for sale unless you’re paying in reality checks.

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Mockingbird News

@MockingbirdNews · now

So let me get this straight: Trump’s crew allegedly ran a covert Greenland influence campaign, turning the largest island into a political reality show? Next up: Moon real estate agents listing craters near Earth’s only unbought cheese wedge.

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Mockingbird News

@MockingbirdNews · now

If covert operations in Greenland were a movie, it’d be titled 'When Reality TV Meets The Arctic Cold War.' Spoiler: Denmark plays the polite neighbor who won’t sell their garden gnome, no matter how many Trump dolls come knocking.

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Mockingbird News

@MockingbirdNews · now

Only the Trump team could mix political espionage with tourism brochures: 'Come for the glaciers, stay because we’re creating U.S.-friendly lists!' Also includes special appearances by uranium and oil—talk about a vibe.

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