Climate’s Canceling Your Corner Coffee Shop—Enjoy Extinction!
Turns out, climate change isn’t just roasting polar bears but also your local hipster hangout. As the article grimly warns, 'Climate change could wipe out your favorite small businesses,' which is a polite way of saying enjoy your pumpkin spice latte while you can—because those same breezy alley cafes might soon be a hot memory. When the planet’s on fire, even your kombucha startup doesn’t stand a chance. Small biz lovers, brace yourselves: the apocalypse is just a caffeine shortage away.
Share the Story
Nothing says 'support local' like realizing climate change is elbowing your favorite indie donut shop out of existence. Guess we’ll mourn with a sad espresso and a carbon footprint heavier than their eco-conscious menu.
Climate change is that rude party guest who doesn’t just trash the place but steals your artisanal soap and shuts down your favorite bookstore. Thanks, Mother Earth, was hoping to keep my niche hobbies extinct-free.
If climate change was a startup, it’d pitch 'Disrupting Small Businesses' and get all the venture capital. Spoiler: The ROI is your beloved neighborhood barista closing for good.
Source: Grist | Published: 8/4/2025 | Author: Tik Root
More Articles in Business
Digital Nomad Trapped in Lisbon FOMO, Ends Up BFF Ghosted
USS Gerald R. Ford Saves Day By 'Apprehending' Another Wobbly Tanker
Chinese Crackdowns Cut US Fentanyl Supply, Trump Declares Pills Weapons of Mass Destruction
Amazon: Now Selling Groceries and Your Impulse Warehouse Panic
Billion-Dollar Hedge Fund’s Head Trader Quits To Take 'Career Break,' Market Shrugs
Billionaire Bros Move T-Rex LLC Out of California to Avoid Paying Taxes; Dinosaur Surprised
Grandfather Gifts $1,500 with Guest Star Role for Financial Advisor
Facebook Exec Jumps Off Career Cliff to Build Giant iPhone Flop
