CDC Gets Bullet Points From Unlikely Health Inspectors
In an absolutely surreal twist, the CDC's Roybal Campus near Emory University was 'struck with gunfire,' leaving bullet holes in windows. Oh, I'm sorry, did I miss the part where the nation's top health agency signed up for 'target practice'? So let me get this straight: while they're busy defending us from viruses, apparently, they've also become a new shooting range. One official soberly noted 'Buildings on the CDC’s Roybal Campus...were struck with gunfire.' I guess bullet holes are the new antibody test results—both equally unwanted and confusing.
Share the Story
(1 of 3)CDC’s Roybal Campus just got some unsolicited bullet holes. Congrats, your vaccine passports now come with lead souvenirs! Who needs biohazards when you’ve got these surprise target practice sessions?
Welcome to the CDC: fighting infectious disease by day, involuntary shooting gallery by night. Maybe the virus isn't the only thing ‘going viral’ here.
CDC’s windows took more shots than the average cocktail hour. Next thing you know, their COVID briefings will include ballistics reports!
Source: Statnews | Published: 8/9/2025 | Author: Daniel Payne
More Articles in US News
Motorola Razr Flip Phones Finally Told They’re Secure Enough for 2027
KPMG’s Consulting Business Dies Dramatically While Staff Take a Hike
America Tries Staying Cool While Secretly Preparing For Wattocalypse
Pentagon Rolls Out Brain Health Tracking, Forgets Staff, Equipment, Common Sense
Nation's Crime Rate Crashes Like Your Uncle’s Pandemic Hangover
Texas Governor Regrets Encouraging Giant Server Barns, Now Halts 1800 Projects
70-Year-Old Foster Grandma’s Retirement Plan: Never Stop Parenting or Working
USPS Demands Voter Info But Swears Court Says ‘Nope’
