Joby Buys Blade’s Choppers, Promises Quieter Billionaire Traffic Jam
In an inspiring display of spendthrift optimism, Joby Aviation dropped a casual $125 million to snap up Blade Air Mobility’s helicopter taxi biz last month, aiming to swap out gas-guzzling whirly birds for eerie quiet eVTOLs that zip 100 miles at 200mph—don't worry, they're 100 times quieter and run on lithium-ion pouches boasting 10,000 flight cycles. Meanwhile, Uber fans can soon book Blade's Manhattan-based chopper rides to JFK, Newark, and even the Hamptons 'as soon as next year,' even though Joby’s magical eVTOLs are still waiting on Uncle Sam’s green light. CEO JoeBen Bevirt promises to unfurl 'the magic of seamless urban air travel'—because who doesn’t want their daily commute to feel like Tony Stark’s awkward little cousin’s startup?
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Joby spent $125M to own noisy helicopters just to tell us they’ll be quieter someday, while letting Uber sell rides to the Hamptons now because ‘magic of seamless urban air travel’ means waiting on FAA fairy dust.
Buying Blade’s noisy helicopters while waiting on FAA approval for silent ones is like ordering a pizza but eating the menu while you wait for the delivery.
Uber’s new helicopter rides from Manhattan to the Hamptons sounds fancy until you remember it’s just another way for ultra-rich folks to skip traffic, small step for man, giant leap for rich man’s commute.
Source: Theverge | Published: 9/10/2025 | Author: Andrew J. Hawkins
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