Australia Survives Trump Tariffs Without Even Saying Hi
In a world-first of diplomatic restraint, Australian cabinet minister Bowen bragged about having 'the world’s lowest tariff on Australia' — all achieved without an awkward sit-down with Donald Trump. Meanwhile, Kristy McBain’s tone was 100% Aussie grim: the country’s telecom suffered not one, but two outages in 'only a couple of years,' which is apparently 'not good enough.' Bowen, ever the humble bragger, mused about world leaders meeting Trump, then leaving with tariffs higher than Elon Musk's Twitter drama count. Anthony Albanese’s 'results matter' mantra champions quiet economics over Trump fan-fests, proving sometimes no handshake beats a hearty tariff slap.
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Australia’s PM skips Trump meet-and-greet, scores lowest tariffs while everyone else got played harder than a TikTok trend. Meanwhile, telecom outages multiply like memes nobody asked for. Priorities: tariffs first, chats maybe later.
Who needs Trump meetings when you can get lowest tariffs and treat your citizens to telecom outages like exclusive bad PR events? Australia’s strategy: silence is golden, outages are not.
International diplomacy in 2025: Anthony Albanese swipes left on Trump, dodges high tariffs, lands best economic Tinder match ever. Telecommunication outages? Just the cost of ignoring red flags.
Source: Theguardian | Published: 9/21/2025 | Author: Royce Kurmelovs
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