Congress 'Plans' to Stop Stock Trading—Shocker, No Votes Yet!

In an epic saga that rivals slow-cooked bureaucracy, bipartisan lawmakers have finally found consensus on a 'new plan' to ban congressional stock trading after years of sitting on it like a timid hen on golden eggs. Details are as sparse as their enthusiasm, but the goal is clear: prove they’re not casually cashing in from their taxpayer-funded influencer status. No votes scheduled yet, because why rush transparency when you can milk it for suspense? This thrilling effort to prevent insider trading by Congress moves slower than a dial-up modem in the era of 5G, leaving constituents wondering if 'steady stall' is the new legislation.

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Source: Feeds | Published: 9/3/2025 | Author: Deirdre Walsh